Replacing Fear with Faith

I over think things... probably more than any human on earth. (over exaggeration, but I feel its true:))

My brain will go around and around in circles. First I have this small fear and then I beat myself up for having that fear and then I think of the consequences of having that fear and then I have another fear and then I beat myself up for having that fear... it's a vicious cycle.

For the past few days I have been STRUGGLING with What could happen, What will happen, and What is going on right now. I can tell you right now, that is NO way to live. And it is a hard way to live too. It made me so depressed and made me want to be by myself. Okay... enough with the depressing and fearful stuff because I am happy right now and thought I would share it with you.

I went to bed last night with every intention of waking up early and going to the temple to pray and meditate. I woke up this morning feeling like there was no hope. My future looked dark. Sure, in "theory" I had faith in Heavenly Father's plan for me, but did I really? Not really.

I was SO consumed with fear of the future that I just didn't feel like I could go to the temple. I didn't even feel like Heavenly Father wanted me to go to the temple. Debbie Downer over here. So then I decided to read my scriptures to try and feel the Spirit. I did.

I was reading in the Book of Mormon in Mosiah where Alma is baptizing all of these people. He goes to the Lord in prayer because he is recognizing that there is sin among these people and he is looking for a way to kind of cleanse the church and restore peace and righteousness. The prayer that Alma offers is a simple one. Pouring out his heart and looking for direction in the Lord's church. The Lord answers him and gives him so many amazing answers.

I decided I was going to do that. I was going to pray, which I normally do. But I was going to pray for forgiveness for the way that I have been thinking. Fearfully.

So I got on my knees and I prayed for forgiveness. I told Heavenly Father that I had somehow lost my faith in his plans for me and that I was sorry. After that, I told him my fears. All of them for right now. Fears about relationships, fears about his mission for me on this earth, and fears about the woman I am becoming. Then I gave ALL of them to Heavenly Father and my Savior Jesus Christ. I told them that now that I have given them my fears. I am praying that they can give me the faith I need to follow their plan for me without knowing every detail of that plan at the beginning, but knowing that I will be given each and every step as I go along. (scary... but gotta do it!) Even now as I am writing this. I am recognizing that Heavenly Father has given me His plan. My patriarchal Blessing! DUH! haha Sure it doesn't give me every little step, but it gives me an outline and as I am faithful I will receive the plan He has for me. Oh hallelujah! :) (Pretty sure there are legions of angels singing the Hallelujah chorus in heaven because it has FINALLY clicked!) haha

Okay, so then I went on some more about some more personal things than I would like to share to the world. And then I said Amen and I waited there, like I have heard so many people say to do after you pray because then you can hear answers to your prayers if Heavenly Father has answers for you. So I waited there and it hit me what I have to do in order for me to replace my fear with faith.

** This is the part I am really excited about sharing with you.**



Ingredients for Replacing Fear with Faith
*disclaimer: This is what I have found Heavenly Father wants me to do. He might want you to do something different, but this is probably a good place to start.*

If you find yourself on the brink of a "fear dive."

1. STOP that fear dead in its tracks.
- Recognize that that is You being fearful. Gather that fear, what is it that you are being fearful about?
i.e. I am fearful that I am going to miss an opportunity.. or I am fearful about this or that.

2. Thank Heavenly Father for allowing you to feel that fear and to be given an opportunity to replace that fear with Faith.

3. Replace that fear with faith. Recognize that Heavenly Father has His plan and is in control. You know that saying "Give it to Jesus"? Do it. "Heavenly Father, I am giving this fear to you, because I know that you have a plan for me. Help me to have faith in your plan and faith that you are in control."

4. Move forward. Keep living your life in the best way you know how. Sure you might slip up. But I know that at the beginning you might feel like you are doing this all the time, but I know that as you continue doing this. Heavenly Father will bless you with Faith. 

*Disclaimer: I do not profess this to be doctrine of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. This is only my own experiences with my Heavenly Father that I have chosen to share.*


As I finish this novel of a post. I just want to say.. I love my Heavenly Father and Savior Jesus Christ. I know that the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints is the only church here on earth that has the whole truth. I know that the Atonement of Jesus Christ is REAL. I know that it is through the Atonement that we can become clean and that we can return to our Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ again someday. I know that the Temple is the House of the Lord and that we can go there to receive answers. I know that prayer is real. I know that the Plan of Salvation is real and that I can be with my Loving, Crazy, and amazing family for eternity and I KNOW that I can have a forever family of my own someday. I love this gospel. It has been and is now a source of so much Happiness and Joy in my life. I know that it is because of this Gospel that I am as truly happy as I am. If there are any of you that are not familiar with the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, I pray that you may learn what this church is all about. If there are are of you that a struggling with your faith, I know that Heavenly Father wants to help you gain faith in Him and His plan for you.
... Okay.. Now that I am done with my soap box... I hope all you wonderful people have a great day!

Love,
Summer

Faith. Prayer. and Love.

HARD!
That is the only way I can describe my month so far.

There have been some happy moments.
There have been some sad moments.
There have been some beautiful moments.
and there have been moments where I just didn't feel like I could go on.

But I have noticed that no matter how much I talk to family and friends... The only peace I receive, even if answers aren't very clear. Is when I pray to my Heavenly Father.
What an amazing Heavenly Father He is. Really! Here I am struggling with a break-up and He takes time to answer my prayers, to send someone to let me know they are proud of me, to allow me the knowledge and power to write down my thoughts and feelings and send them out into the universe. Whether they reach someone or not. They are out there to read. They are out there to absorb. They are out there to heal hearts. Even though it might not be mine at the moment... Maybe someday it will be.

My heart will be healed again one day, and I look forward to that day because this ache that I feel at the end of each day is... really just hard. I got an answer that I need to be happy right now... and when I have this ache in my heart... it can really make it difficult.


I will try though, because I am not a quitter.
I am a Daughter of God.
I have legions of angels on my side.
Rooting for me. Cheering me on. and Praying for me.
Whether here on earth or on the other side of the veil.
I am in the refiner's fire right now and well... It sucks.
"I never said it would be easy... I only said it would be worth it."
How true those words are... especially now.

Well, Heavenly Father, here is to you. The master of my world. The one that has everything in His hands, because I have given up my will and allowed you to work the plan that you have. And I know it is a good one too. :)

I love my Heavenly Father and I will do whatever He asks me, because at the end of the day. It is Him that I have to answer to. Literally.


.... What a scary thought ...

 And the fact that I LOVE HIM and my Savior with Every FIBER OF MY BEING!

What a fitting song to listen to now.

"The best is yet to come. You think you've seen the sun, but you aint seen it shine.... Wait till you see that sunshinin' day."


"The best is yet to come..." and the day I am kneeling at that altar with my eternal companion will be... truly amazing. Because I will have worked and grown specifically for Him. Whoever he is.


I love my life. I love my life. How true those words are... I really do love my life and I would NOT trade it for anything because this is one heck of a romance novel if you ask me! :) haha I am living a Hallmark/Romance novel/movie. And I am LOVING IT! :)   *Side note: Not that I enjoy hurting people for the sake of a good plot.... I would never do that "just because..." Okay... Read on:)

**Sorry for the back and forth on the emotions... I'll blame it on the music."